A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When The Stipper Is Crying
Bloodhound Gang Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴I was lonelier than Kunta Kinte at a Merle Haggard concert
That night I strolled on into Uncle Limpy's Hump Palace lookin' for love
It had been a while
In fact, three hundred and sixty-five had come and went
Since that midnight run haulin' hog to Shakey Town on I-10
I had picked up this hitchhiker that was sweatin' gallons
Through a pair of Daisy Duke cut-offs and one of those Fruit Of The Loom tank-tops
Well, that night I lost myself to ruby red lips Milky white skin and baby blue eyes
Name was Russell
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well, faster than you can say, "shallow grave"
This pretty little thing come up to me and starts kneadin' my balls
Like hard-boiled eggs in a tube sock
Said her name was Bambi and I said, "Well that's a coincidence darlin'
'Cause I was just thinkin' about skinnin' you like a deer"
Well she smiled, had about as much teeth as a Jack-O-Lantern
And I went on to tell her how I would wear her face like a mask
As I do my little kooky dance
And then she told me to shush
I guess she could sense my desperation
'Course, it's hard to hide a hard-on when you're dressed like Minnie Pearl
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
So, Bambi's goin' on about how she can make all my fantasies come true
So I says, "Even this one I have where Jesus Christ
Is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole
With a lawn dart as Garth Brooks gives birth to something
Resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum?"
Well, ten beers, twenty minutes and thirty dollars later
I'm parkin' the beef bus in tuna town if you know what I mean
Got to nail her back at her trailer
Heh, that rhymes
I have to admit it was even more of a turn-on
When I found out she was doin' me to buy baby formula
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Day or so had passed when I popped the clutch
Gave the tranny a spin and slid on into
The Stinky Pinky Gulp N' Guzzle Big Rig Snooze-A-Stop
There I was browsin' through the latest issue of "Throb"
When I saw Bambi starin' at me from the back of a milk carton
Well, my heart just dropped
So, I decided to do what any good Christian would
You can not imagine how difficult it is to hold a half gallon of moo juice
And polish the one-eyed gopher when your doin' seventy-five
In an eighteen-wheeler
I never thought missing children could be so sexy
Did I say that out loud?
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Overall Meaning
The lyrics to Bloodhound Gang's song "A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When The Stripper Is Crying" describe the singer's exploits at a strip club called Uncle Limpy's Hump Palace. The lyrics depict a scenario in which the singer gets a lap dance from a stripper named Bambi, who he suggests is crying while she dances for him. The chorus repeats the theme of preferring a lap dance when the stripper is crying, which suggests that the singer finds the scenario more taboo and therefore more thrilling. The lyrics also allude to violent fantasies and a sense of desperation in the singer, who seems to be using the strip club as a way to feel wanted and desired.
Some critics have interpreted the song as a satire of male power fantasies and the objectification of women in strip clubs. The lyrics portray the singer's desire as being fueled by a sense of desperation and unhappiness, which may suggest that the song is satirizing the idea that strip clubs can provide a fulfilling emotional experience for men. Other critics have pointed out that the song's references to violent fantasies and the objectification of women may be offensive to some listeners, particularly women.
Overall, "A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When The Stripper Is Crying" is a controversial song that has divided critics and audiences alike. Some see it as a biting satire of male power fantasies and the objectification of women, while others see it as a crude and offensive portrayal of male sexual desire.
Line by Line Meaning
I was lonelier than Kunta Kinte at a Merle Haggard concert
I was incredibly lonely that night.
That night I strolled on into Uncle Limpy's Hump Palace lookin' for love
I went into a strip club that night looking for companionship.
It had been a while
It had been a long time since I had felt close to someone.
In fact, three hundred and sixty-five had come and went
A year had passed since I had felt connected to anyone.
Since that midnight run haulin' hog to Shakey Town on I-10
It had been a year since I had taken a road trip.
I had picked up this hitchhiker that was sweatin' gallons
I had given a ride to a person who was sweating heavily.
Through a pair of Daisy Duke cut-offs and one of those Fruit Of The Loom tank-tops
The hitchhiker was wearing short shorts and a tank top.
Well, that night I lost myself to ruby red lips
I became enamored with a stripper's red lipstick that night.
Milky white skin and baby blue eyes
I was attracted to a stripper with light-colored skin and eyes.
Name was Russell
The stripper's name was Russell.
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
I enjoy lap dances where the stripper cries because it makes it more exciting for me.
Well I find it's quite a thrill
I find it exciting to have a stripper grind on me against her will.
When she grinds me against her will
I enjoy it when I can feel the stripper resisting me during a lap dance.
Well, faster than you can say, "shallow grave"
Suddenly and unexpectedly,
This pretty little thing come up to me and starts kneadin' my balls
A stripper rubbed my genitals.
Like hard-boiled eggs in a tube sock
The stripper squeezed my genitals so hard it felt like hard-boiled eggs in a tube sock.
Said her name was Bambi and I said, "Well, that's a coincidence darlin'
The stripper named herself Bambi, and I commented on the coincidence of her name.
I was just thinkin' about skinnin' you like a deer"
I said to the stripper that I was thinking about killing her like a deer.
And then she told me to shush
The stripper wanted me to quiet down.
'Course, it's hard to hide a hard-on when you're dressed like Minnie Pearl
It's hard to conceal an erection when you're wearing a costume like Minnie Pearl's.
So, Bambi's goin' on about how she can make all my fantasies come true
The stripper was trying to convince me that she could fulfill all of my desires.
So I says, "Even this one I have where Jesus Christ
I asked the stripper if she could even fulfill my fantasy of Jesus and Mickey Mouse engaging in a bizarre sex act.
Ten beers, twenty minutes and thirty dollars later
After consuming alcohol and spending time with the stripper, I paid her thirty dollars.
I'm parkin' the beef bus in tuna town if you know what I mean
I had sex with the stripper.
Got to nail her back at her trailer
I had sex with the stripper at her home.
It rhymes
I made a silly comment about my previous sentence rhyming.
Even more of a turn-on when I found out she was doin' me to buy baby formula
It was even more exciting for me when I learned that the stripper was engaging in sex work to support her child.
Day or so had passed when I popped the clutch
A day or so after my encounter with the stripper,
Gave the tranny a spin and slid on into The Stinky Pinky Gulp N' Guzzle Big Rig Snooze-A-Stop
I stopped at a truck stop named The Stinky Pinky Gulp N' Guzzle and parked my vehicle.
There I was browsin' through the latest issue of "Throb"
I was reading a pornographic magazine called "Throb."
When I saw Bambi starin' at me from the back of a milk carton
I saw a photograph of the missing stripper, Bambi, on a milk carton.
Well, my heart just dropped
I felt a sense of sadness and loss upon seeing her picture.
So, I decided to do what any good Christian would
I decided to take action in her honor.
You can not imagine how difficult it is to hold a half gallon of moo juice
It is difficult to masturbate while driving a truck and holding a half gallon of milk.
And polish the one-eyed gopher when your doin' seventy-five
It is difficult to masturbate quickly while driving at seventy-five miles per hour.
I never thought missing children could be so sexy
I made a tasteless and inappropriate joke about missing children.
Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group
Written by: JAMES M. FRANKS
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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